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Professor of Smurfology ...

Obtainer of rare smurftiquities ...

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John's Ass

There are places you can't even go ...

I have the funniest piece of dialog running through my head right now. If I could find a way to work it into the burning plot bunny that's eating a hole through my brain I TOTALLY WOULD! It's all about what exactly constitutes sex in different cultures. For example: Between and a male a female partner, is it only considered sex if there is penetration? Like, boy parts to girl parts? By that same token, does the man have to achieve orgasm or would it still be considered sex if only the woman orgasmed? What if there was penetration with no completion by either party? What about oral and/or manual stimulation? If either of the involved persons orgasms during oral sex does that constitute "sex"? Or is it just considered foreplay regardless of whether or not it led to the next step (meaning, penetration)?

Seriously, this is what I've been thinking about today and the mental image I'm getting of this girl (who happens to not be human, which is where the cultural differences come into play) talking to a group of human men about how often she has sex is KILLING ME! I'm laughing hysterically on the inside.

And this just proves that I'm going to end up writing porn, oops, erotica in the near future. It was all those bodice ripping romance novels I read in my youth! They warped my fragile mind and make me think of things in terms of literary sex. AWESOME!

In news that does not involve talks about boy parts, I totally saw Iron Man 2 today and I think I kinda love it! I'm planning on watching the first movie tonight. I have to say that IM2 was completely what I was expecting it to be. It was loud, shiny, pretty, fast, and Tony Stark was perfect. Loved it!

In the land of the aforementioned burning plot bunny, I've written over 8000 words and I'm only half way through chapter 3. Holy crap! No, I haven't written anything today. Yet. The night's still young. Or maybe it's not even night yet. Whatever. I have time. I plan on writing. After I watch Iron Man. Excellent.

Alright. I've got things to do. Very, very important things.